It is so easy to go from being grateful to taking something for granted isn’t it? An invisible shape shifting status that is as transiently inevitable and unavoidable as coast erosion changes a landscape forever so that the vista feels like it has always been so to the beholder.
Today I want to remind myself about this; and to take a moment to pay tribute to myself and my awesome levels of determination and, I guess, self regard.
Specifically, I want to say well done to clever me for eliminating alcohol from my life *almost* five hundred days ago.
Now it probably seems odd to be doing this. I don’t want it to be interpreted as some kind of attention seeking humble boast. I genuinely believe we should celebrate ourselves and our hidden achievements more. For me, writing these things down is a way to stay publicly accountable to myself.
You can search through my “sobriety” and “sober curious” posts on the blog to follow my journey from the start if you want to.
475 seems an odd count to celebrate, but every day that passes is another one in the bag; just these days it hardly crosses my mind. I take it for granted. I now have brighter eyes, great skin, more patience, less anxiety, better self-talk you name it, tee-total has improved it. Well ok, my waistline has actually increased but no body is perfect!
I’m by no means a preacher; I love it when people ignore my non drinking ways and get boozy around me – a huge compliment! I loved social drinking; the hangovers were just getting unbearable to the point of just not even worth a couple. Interestingly, I also get “hangovers” from certain AF/de-alcohol ised beers and sparking wines – must see what additives trigger this as something really doesn’t agree with me there irrespective of volume. I was poisoning myself for fun basically.
Meanwhile, I love the fact I can now proudly be myself in a group – the ultimate wallflower – as an extroverted introvert I love nothing more than to listen to your stories without being under pressure to be the life and soul in return. That’s what alcohol did for me and it was exhausting and felt terribly fraudulent even though for you I was probably a lot more fun than I am now. So please know I’m not anti-social, I’m just a little erratic: quiet at times and not at others depending on my mood. Just accept that. What a lot of rubbish I used to speak! No excuses for that now!!
Summer number two is nearing a close. I’ve jumped the usual triggers of sundowner hurdles with ease. Next stop winter warmers, the smell of hot toddies and mulled cider…. I’m limbering up! To be honest, I’m so not bothered these days. Hearing this might not be your cup of tea and so be it!
This for me is truly liberating.
Have a brilliant weekend! Whatever you are up to, try to remember to be grateful – and to do things, even just in some tiny way, your way if you can.